sExhibition spring 2011

So it came Spring and the sexhibition ;D Had alot of fun. This year was a little different cause I was "workin" there. I was a volunteer worker for SMFR
It was fun I met alot of new ppl from the genre and many other ppl. I actually met someone really interrestin but this stupid girl did not ask for his number or let him do what he wanted even she did REALLY wanted that too... STUPID ME! Maybe we'll meet again... Dunno. He did leave me a mark of himself... My hand will hurt for awhile its a little swollen... We had a tiny duel...
My aunt came to sexhibition too... That didnt feel awkward at all... Really funny. I was spankin a guy and my aunt with her man lookin at me...
So this is whats on my mind right now about this...

This years score...
New interrestin ppl.
A little of experienses on spankin guys and usin some equipment..
some bruses on my but..
swollen hand
Maybe a new friend or two

-Frozen (Pakaste perhonen)

No chocolate for this easter bunny...

So its easter... One of these stupid reasons to "party" and eat too much... I hoped for a relaxin easter holiday but what did I get... A whole lot of drama. At a party I aparently hit this girl that was touchin my hair even I told her to stop. Yes she was drunk but thats not an excuse to do stuff when someone tells you NO. I did not hit her I wiped her hand of my head and her own had hit her in the face, but she said I did... Her BF is my friend and has been for several years I would not like this to greate any friction between me and him but its obvious its gonna, cause I just dont like that girl. I'm ok hangin out with her there but really I dont like her. I dont hate her eather so no problem there.

I been stressed cause of school and have gotten my feelings hurt so so many times last week that I seem really angry at everyone. I'm not. Its just the stress. I wasn't suposed to start worrying about school stuff but then one of our teachers desited to give us more work. I have only tomorrow to finnish all that I'v suposed to have done this year and thanks to that same retard teacher I dont even know what the things r... I'm truly sorry if I seem pissed at you or if I have said somethin stupid.
The morning after that party I might have managed to piss of a person I really didnt mean to. I love him I would never on purpose hurt him or be disrespectfull. I know that "I was tired" Is not an excuse, but I really didnt mean that. I do have a tendensy to say stupid stuff and I normally warn ppl about that, I told him eventually I'll say somethin stupid. If he is reading this I am truly sorry.

My mood swings r a bit crazy aren't they? I never said I'm sane...

-Stupid bad easter bunny Frozen.

Update on life and also a little poem..

Well I been ok. Got a on-the-job learnin place from espoocity museum Really happy for that but well..
Finland has elected parliament and it seems bad most ppl chose to vote for ppl that r against Gays. Really disappointed and a bit ashamed to be finnish.. Feels like they have voted against me personally for some reason. I am Bi-sexual and have promiced to myself that I will only marry if gays can do it too. Dunno what the future brings...

On the other hand I'm happy and... Kinda... I would say in love. I have no idea if he likes me like that but I dont care I like this feeling alot and if somethin happens it happens cant do nothin but enjoy now that I can. Wrote this a week ago him in mind... Its alittle sexual..

I wan't...

I Wan't you to torture me and make me come.
I wan't you to kiss me and hold me in your arms.
I wan't you to let me be your bad little girl, punish me.
I wan't you to make me your princess, pamper me.
I wan't you to be my master, my torturer, my teacher, my only will.
I wan't... I wan't you... I just wan't you.
I wan't you and everythin with you.


-Frozen.

Hmh. more of these.

This just happenned to pop in mind last night and the other stuff this morning.

Change one word and you got the truth.

I feel like I'm in a cloud of happy thoughts.
Soon to be falling down from the sky.
soon, you who lifted me up there, will just stop holding me there and I will fall.
I feel so high.
You will let me down like all the others before you.
Like all the wrong ones, you are as wrong.
Right now I feel so great, so beautiful, so smart.
But I have also the doubt of my past and yours.
Please be true, dont let me fall and always have my back.
Please! I feel like this time I'm so high that I might not make the fall.
Please let this just be my silly feelings, Me beeing cautious.
Do you like me? cause I do you.
I like you alot.
Maybe I like you too much.
Maybe You could not like me as much.


yep I'm once again goin down the same old road.
I know this person propably could not "like" me the way I like him, thanks to alot of things like life situation and age and location, But still I kinda would want him to. I have no idea about his feelings maybe I'm just a really good friend and if thats the case I wanna stay that way. I have known him too little time to know enought to say how he feels. I think this might be one of those crushes (yes its a crush) that I might want to keep as the safety zone (some ppl have a crush that they go back to when everythin else fails and its suposed to be really like unreachable buut still active.) my new safety crush. The last one failed bad...
The person who recognizes them self in this: Dont worry its just me. U do not have to do anythin. I still hope you know who u r. If it happens you like me then please tell me cause I'll never ask and just torture myself.

Some poetry.

Some... thougths and "poems" I have wrote...

How could anyone remember someone like me?
The one who always falls for ppl who cant be with her.
Never could. But still I want to fight for somethin that lasts, Somethin that stays.
Who would remember and stay?
Noone, never, not with the forgotten one the broken one.
She falls for the taken ones, the wrong ones, the ones that will break her.
Forever She'll be broken and used.

This feeling is the best and the worst.
The best in the way that life seems to have a meaning.
Worst in the way that everything is so uncertaint and I seem stupid.
Why is it that when I like someone It makes me clumbsier then I actually am?
Why does it still make u feel good?
Noone could see this coming. No one could predict.
U just really hope that the other person likes u back and that U dont make a total fool of your self.
Only time can tell and thats all that is certaint.

These r old and... Shit....or tell me if its shit

Trash fest 2011

I'll be tryin to write this blog in english from time to time so that my friends around the world can read it.
So Trash fest was this weekend and I had so much fun. This years trash fest left me with a melancholic feeling. It was the last of its kind (atleast for now...) and Still the best one I been to. Every year from Trash fest 2 I have had the best time there and now its ending. But well I'm keeping my hopes up about it coming back to Hellsinki, Hell city where It belongs.

I'm gonna go through this weekend in the order things come in to mind and I'll try to remember the right days and times that everythin happenned. I didnt sleep much so in my mind its just a one long day.

This year started for me at the kickoff-party in Semifinal. I had been waiting for a year to see Night by Night again and had made Ben a birhtday card. I had made a NxN logo out of legos and took a picture of it. Ben aparently loved it. He asked for the pic to put it up to their web site.
NxN Has a new singer Dan. First time I heard that they got a new singer I almost started to cry cause I loved Ben's singing and sometimes when a band thats already great gets a new singer changes to something totally different, but I am so glad to say that did not happen. Dan fits NxN perfectly and seems like a really down to earth guy.
Then at the kickoff there was also performin two other bands Crystal Rain and Trash gallery. Trash Gallery is gonna get its own chapter on this blog, but now for Crystal Rain. This band is finnish and I've seen the ppl from it like a thousand times in bars but never knew that they have a band... Well they were good and plus for havin a female basist.

Mama T gave me a cd of a band called Sunset Riot. It was just one song called Rattlesnake and well I decided to listen to it just cause I was waiting for the bus and there was nothin else to do. I ended up listenin to that one song for like 7 times in a row. The first thing that came in to mind was "Why the hell have I not heard of this band before?" They Rock. The singer Del was at trash fest hostin the show so on thursday (or friday...) I went and bought their cd and asked him to sign it. He was so awesome to hang out with. I really hope they get a gig in finland soon.

Every day there was awesome band performin and just hangin out in gloria. It was so nice seein the New gen guys again. I showed the NxN guys my pics and they loved them and I had them write stuff on my notebook (Ben jovi LOL)
Met Acey Slade :D He was awesome too.

Now its time for the Trash gallery chapter. This band was performin at the kickoff-party. I took pics at that gig too and they came out really great. I liked the band alot but at the start of the gig Mara was sain to me like "This is so boring" and Mara and Emmi went to sit down and well I did too after a few songs cause I was wearing heals witch I shall never do again. I hate that I did that, but my feet were hurting like hell.
The next day I went to talk to Neen the singer of TG my intention was just to say Hi! and show him some pics but as I started to talk to him I really just couldn't stop. I mean... It was so nice to just talk with him. I was tellin him stuff I really don't even like to talk about to my friends, who I've know for years. Emmi, Mara and Riikka where all like "Anni Come on U have been talkin to him like 4 hour What the hell!". For some weird reason it felt like we had known for years, maybe we have known each other in another life lol. I asked Neen and Brian (the basist of TG) to write on the notebook too. It a shame that they had to leave so early they missed the hole saturday. Those guys I'm gonna miss alot specially Neen. Hope to see them in finland or maybe I'll travel to some other country to see them.

Trash fest left me with New bands to listen to, A ton of pics, New friend and a Hell of a lot of inspiration to do what I do. This weekend gave me enought to survive this year with its ups and downs. Thank you everyone. Loved It!!!

Pics will be on my FB site and I'll start to make my own web page too when I have time.

-Frozen